Thursday, February 2, 2023
My adventures in writing
Monday, May 10, 2021
Childhood mistakes?
My sister asked me this question. Would you change anything about your childhood if you could go back? This is my reply in a a story.
I don't think there is anything about my childhood I would want to change. All of us make dumb mistakes in our childhood that we are ashamed of. But those mistakes sometimes mold us into who we become. It's really none of my business because my past is not my own. God is the author of my autobiography, not me. Who am I to change it? If I messed with my past I bet there would be a problem in the space time continuum and I am not Michael J. Fox in the least. I think messing with the past God gave me is a crime. Referring to what I said earlier about having mistakes in our past mold us, mixing that with fantasy, would there be a story about Scrooge if he had gone back and fixed the past? Would Anakin Skywalker have turned out like George Lucas wrote him if he had gone back and fixed his past? Which all human pasts are messy by nature, dirty, bloody and sinful pasts, not unlike Anakin. God loves us so much that he gave us an opportunity to leave all our dirty pasts at the foot of the cross on which he sent his Son to die on to be the propitiation for our dirty, bloody, sinful pasts and give us new life free from bondage to our bloody, sinful pasts. He washes those pasts away with his blood (which kind of sounds ironic) and clothes us in white robes of righteousness. So he who believes in Him can live forever in his kingdom and share in the glorious inheritance in His presence. "For God so loved the world, that he gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life." John 3:16 "For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 6:23
If I won ...
My sister asked me If someone were to tell you, “Congratulations, you just won a lifetime supply of ______!” what would you want to hear in that blank? Here is my reply in story form.
If I had someone of authority grant me a life-time supply of something I wanted, that would be too good to be true. And there are little things on earth that I would truly want a life-time supply of. In truth, I would rather have a life-time supply of something not tangible but useful and treasured. Something like love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, kindness, faithfulness and self-control and the wisdom to use all of it. Everyone knows life doesn't last forever on Earth, so what exactly is a life-time supply? If you have too much of one thing, you might die and never get to use it in your life-time. "And He told them a parable, saying, "The land of a rich man produced plentifully, and he thought to himself, "What shall I do, for I have nowhere to store my crops?" And he said, " I will do this: I will tear down my barns and build larger ones, and there I will store all my grain and my goods. And I will say to my soul, "Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry." But God said to him, " Fool! This night your soul is required of you, and the things you have prepared, whose will they be?" So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God." Luke 12:16-21 Is a life-time supply just what you can use during this life? How would anyone know just how much is a life-time supply. I say don't even think about a "life-time supply." "Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:19-21 Trust in God and one day he will give you eternity with Him and you will need no earthly supply. It is very strange that heavenly mindfulness can give you a certain cynical view of earthly things. That's all for now.
Advice from one A-T warrior to another
My sister asked me recently, what advice would I give to a young person with A-T. I answered her with this story. I have a lot of advice to give one of my kind, if one of my kind cared to lend an ear. I would tell them to surrender to God and His purpose for their life so that no one could mess it up, not even A.T. can mess it up. Romans 8:28 says, "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose." I'd want to tell them that they are beautiful whoever they are despite what the world thinks or what you might think of yourself. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. God is the only beholder that really matters. And the Lord God sees you and loves you as you are. 1 Samuel 16:7 says, "Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature . . . For the Lord sees not as man sees; man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart." If you truly choose to trust God with your life, the Lord will view you as a beloved precious child and a very unique and fabulous creation. Galatians 3:26 says, "For you are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus." 2 Corinthians 5:17 says, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come." It takes guts to follow the Lord and forsake the world's opinion or even ignore your opinion, and submit to the will of God. As God's child, we will inherit a place to live eternally forever with our Lord and Father and we will be able to come before Him in a brand new body and show Him praise by kneeling down or dancing or singing with our perfect vocal cords and knees and perfect diaphragm in that case. Also, I would like to share that the Lord has conquered the world already. So that means in spite of the world's frustrating and maddening troubles coupled with A.T.'s troubles, they are not going to be with us forever if we know and serve the Lord. John 16:33 says, "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." Aside from that, God has a perfect plan for your life. It might not be your plan but He is perfect so He has the perfect plan. Then finally, I would like to share that God did not create us to be cowards or scaredy cats to sit in the corner and spiral down in depression and accept the devil's lies. He made us with the intent of survival even to be sort of conquerors in the faith and everyday life.
Monday, June 15, 2020
Life Changing Love
Jesus changed my life through Joni and
friends family retreat. He didn’t do it
over night, I’m not really sure if He took a week or longer to do it but He got
us there in both senses of the word literally and figuratively. I did not choose to go, I first went because
Dad was asked to go be the camp pastor.
The deep love of Jesus was there but I
didn’t have eyes to see it. I remember that specific retreat at Mission Springs;
we had an Olympian theme that year. I remember the name of my STM but I also
recall the tween program I was in performing some uplifting scriptural song
that matched the Olympic theme in front of all our parents. I did not
participate, I was up there on the Redwood
deck surrounded by smiles, singers and performers but I sat there like a bump
on a log. I sat in stubborn silence because I didn’t understand what was going on,
I thought I was above these disabled people, so I shouldn’t have to preform I
was even embarrassed to be up there.
I don’t know exactly when Jesus opened
my eyes to see His deep unfathomable love. To help explain how I see Jesus’ love
at Joni and friends family retreat, I am going to take you to a Yuba/Sutter Symphony
pops concert. Imagine a large church congregational room with three or more
sections of pews and chairs, a large stage that fit a small symphony. I was in the front row of chairs on the far left,
Dad was in the trombone section of the symphony. I enjoyed these pops concerts especially
because they featured songs from beloved movies. This particular pops concert featured three specific
Disney songs; Part of Your World from the little Mermaid, Out There
from the Hunchback of Notre Dame, and I think I Can Go the Distance from
Hercules. Those similarly themed songs were sung so beautifully and passionately,
they played on my heart like an instrument. I felt emotionally stiffled, I had
to leave the building so I could breath.
Those three songs speak of discontent of this world and longing to belong. HHHmmm…
Sound familiar? Sadly, that’s
like an anthem for the disabled right? For
the typical people and disabled people that know Jesus this can apply to longing
for Heaven. Joni and Friends family retreat
is sometimes viewed as a piece of Heaven, but not quite because I can imagine
it and I know for a fact Heaven will be disease free with not a wheelchair in
sight. Family retreats display Jesus’ love in abundance
to the whole family. There is so much disability there it cancels out mine and
I feel free to enjoy fellowship with Jesus’s people and I truly enjoy a sense
of belonging. That is just one way God displays His amazing grace and boundless
love at family retreat. Joni and friends
has changed my life in that Jesus has given me more compassion and purpose to
love people affected by disability. You mustn’t
take my word for it, you must go experience the prodigious love of God yourself
at Joni and friends family retreat.
1 Corinthians 13:1-3
If I speak in the
tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a
clanging cymbal. And
if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all
knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have
not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my
body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Friday, September 20, 2019
Reflection
When I was probably
within my first 6 years of life, I enjoyed Ballet class. I bet you can imagine a
room with mirror lined walls, a dance floor and a banister. I was one of the girls
in tights and pink leotards with their hair in tight little buns.
Now that I
look back, I feel somewhat hypocritical. Because no matter how beautifully I paint my
past, I am grateful to the Lord that He steered me away from that. My Mom pointed
out that I spent a lot of the time of ballet class gazing adoringly at myself
in the mirror. Of course, I don’t remember
that, but that doesn’t mean it’s not true.
That’s probably exactly what happened. It’s perfectly natural for little
girls to be evil, but that’s not my point. My point is that my worst enemy is
and has always been either myself or the mirror.
If you happen
to observe my room, you might notice a distinct lack of mirrors. To me, mirrors
feed arrogance and breed contempt for yourself or for others. When I was a child, I adored myself in a mirror.
Now when I spend too much time looking in the mirror, I see all my ugly flaws and
faults of mine and I despise myself. It is really tempting sometimes to wish I
could swing a sledgehammer into our floor length mirror. The only time I find a
mirror useful is to fix something I do not usually see. People have asked me what my favorite Disney princess
is. I have thought up and told different answers to different people. But I relate
to Mulan because she struggles with her reflection. I still do not like my
reflection in the mirror, but I’ve learned to trust what God says about me instead
of trusting what my reflection says about me. I am honored to be who God says I am. I guess it
takes faith in the Lord to know who I truly am because I am the Lord’s; therefore,
I can only find my true identity in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Saturday, January 12, 2019
A-T Hope Cure
A while ago, my mom told me that the ATCP wanted people with A-T
to make a video saying that they needed a cure. When she asked me if I would
make one, I declined. I didn't want to say I "needed" a cure. I
decided to write explaining why. Some may think it absurd or offensive, but I
don’t care--it’s true. I don’t need a cure because I already have one.
God is my cure. He gives me life and purpose through His great love. The
following verses explain what the Bible says about God as a cure:
John 3:16-- For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever
believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.
John
11:25-- Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever
believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live,
Jeremiah 29:11-- For I know the plans I have for you, declares the
Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a
hope.
John 16:33-- I have told you these
things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble.
But take heart! I have overcome the world.
The Bible is full of examples of healing and restoration through
faith in the Lord. My A-T is no different than any other kind of “trouble” or
“perishing” that Christ is talking about in John 16:33 and 3:16. I have faith
that He has overcome it.
Secondly, God has shown me His love in the friends and family He
has given me. He has proven to me that if I did not have A-T, I would not
have met so many of my friends. God provides a cure for me through these
kindred spirits, showing me His love through them. Around them, I can really
come out and be myself! Also, God does not only give me friends for just me,
but He lets me serve Him by ministering to them as well. With my friends, I get
to be blessed and be a blessing.
I don’t mean to say that there can’t or shouldn’t be a medical
cure for A-T. I would still wish for a cure to bring hope to others and
especially to children in the future who will be diagnosed. Even though I know
He could, I don’t believe that God is going to cure me medically from A-T. God
has His own reasons, and I may not ever know exactly what they are. But this I
know: He gave me A-T for His own reason, and He is not done with me.
For all people affected by A-T who don’t know Him, I pray that
they will someday accept the love of Christ, so that they can know a cure like
I’ve come to know.
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