Duhh!!

Duhh! I feel so stupid sometimes! I rediscovered God’s plan for my life. Here I was, trying desperately to find something colossal to do for Him and He’s telling me to trust Him, be still, put all your ambitions aside, and hang in there! What I have known all along and have been afraid to realize is He wants me right here, living in Wheatland with this abomination of a disease and having the courage to reach out to others in need. That’s SO not what I wanted! It is His will and I want His will. It’s like I have been fighting with Him all this time and He finally got through to my soul. To catch my drift, I think my struggle with Him is best described in this song by Tenth Avenue North called “By My Side”.

Why are you striving these days? 
Why are you trying to earn grace? 
Why are you crying? 
Let me lift up your face 
Just don't turn away

Why are you looking for love? 
Why are you still searching? 
As if I'm not enough? 
To where will you go child, 
Tell me where will you run? 
To where will you run?

Chorus:
Cause I'll be by your side wherever you fall 
In the dead of night whenever you call 
Please don't fight these hands that are holding you 
My hands are holding you

Look at these hands, at my side 
They swallowed the grave, on that night 
When I drank the world's sin 
So I could carry you in 
And give you life

Chorus:

Here at my side wherever you fall 
In the dead of night whenever you call 
Please don't fight these hands that are holding you 
My hands are holding you 
And I, I love you 
And I want you to know 
That I, I'll love you

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CdjRmM0Q0qs