On a Mission?

Most people don’t know this about me but I can’t hide it any longer. I have always wanted to go on a mission trip. I want to do more ministry. Blogging is a ministry to me, but it isn’t enough. It is like it says in Genesis about Cain giving what he wanted to the Lord instead of what the Lord wanted him to give. I want to blog—I enjoy it. In my first post I told you I was blogging for ministry purposes. That is true. But I feel like it is not enough. I feel like the Lord wants me to do more than I already do.

I keep going back in my mind to some song lyrics from Beauty and the Beast. In “Be Our Guest”, it says,

“…Life is so unnerving for a servant who’s not serving. He's not whole without a soul to wait upon. Ah, those good ol' days, when we were useful! Suddenly, those good ol' days are gone. Ten years we’ve been rusting, needing so much more than dusting, needing exercise—a chance to use our skills…”

That is so true for me. I feel stagnant, like I am not serving.

In some ways, I almost feel like I am running from God like Jonah. I have been scared to face what the Lord wants me to do, not that I know exactly what it is. But maybe I wasn't willing? Now, in the belly of Wheatland, I want nothing more than to travel. There are so many places I would like to go, but I do not know where the Lord wants me. I am still scared, but I want to obey. I would even go overseas if I had to. Going to a different country sounds interesting and adventurous. It sounds so much fun to learn a different culture.

It seems not too long ago my father was a missionary to Russia. I always wanted to go there, but it seemed like a place that wasn't really accessible. How could I be there? Where would I stay? When my father was there, he would tell the Russian Christians about me and they prayed for me. Because of this, I have friends in Russia who I haven't even met in person. I am friends with people like Svetlana who was a Russian translator. She came to my 21^st birthday ball. She worked with my grandfather before he passed away when my grandfather and father taught in the churches in many different places in Russia. Some of the Russian people used to send gifts back to me with my father and now I support a boy in Russia through World Help.

Wherever the Lord tells me to go, I will be glad to follow. I feel like I would be happier in Jesus if I were able to better serve Him. I feel like I am meant for this. I pray that He will give me an opportunity?